Laura 0:00
Welcome to divinely grounded a podcast inviting you into sacred presence for real time alchemy tether to this awe inspiring space of conscious conversation so you can be activated by the electric exchange of raw conscious relationship. Witness where you're being called to polish the edges of your discernment in relationship with yourself and with others.
Jenna 0:25
Join us as divinely grounded plants fresh seeds of possibility to discover the purity of your unfolding truth. Together, we will transmute everyday experience into profound growth. I'm Jenna Greengold, the conscious Alchemist,
Laura 0:40
and I'm Laura mazzotta, an Akashic therapist. Sit back, relax and receive as new insights enter your awareness during these illuminating conversations. Welcome back to divinely grounded episode three, Jenna, take it away.
Jenna 1:04
Really throw me on the spot there, huh? So I wanted to talk about something that came up for me today, and it was this concept of, I mean, we deal with this all the time. Is this concept of imposter syndrome and belonging. So, yeah, that came forward for me today, and I ended up writing some stuff down just to, like, immediately, alchemize it in the moment. And that's just something I've been going to recently, just to not, like, you know, attach to anything that comes up in my head. I wrote down stuff about, you know, like, dispel insecurity, release unworthiness, don't shrink those type of things. Just feel the energy and stop attaching to, like, just bullshit, you know what I mean, like, but it's such a gross energy to feel when it comes up in your field, you know?
Laura 2:00
yeah, yeah. Tell me what it feels like when it shows up.
Jenna 2:03
I don't know. It's almost like a rejection of self in a really weird way, because it's like, I'm not, because I'm not doing that. But when you're in that space and you feel there's a lot of shoulds that come into the field with that, right, a lot of shoulds that that you assign to yourself based on external shit. What are your thoughts?
Laura 2:28
I like that because it it's showing you where you are still shrinking and being all of who you are. Because it's funny. This is coming up. I was literally starting to type last night in Instagram threads, which is one of my favorite, favorite social media. It is my favorite social media outlet anyway. So I was writing on Instagram threads that imposter syndrome is sacred because this came up in a client session yesterday, and it reminded me that it's sacred because it is a reminder or an invitation back to the fact that it's not about us, right? That it's not about us, that we are. We get into our heads about this shrinking piece when it's really like, okay, like your fears, cute and all. But this really isn't about whether you're scared, like you're just meant to deliver what I'm bringing through you. You're meant to deliver what I'm what I'm bringing forward within your field, you know? And I think that if we really defer to that, we don't have to shrink, because it's really us just showing up as we're being presented when we're in full surrender to spirit. And I think that imposter syndrome showing up shows us that we're at that next level, that we're already there, and that we're just coming into understanding of the fact that we are already at this sense of belonging, and we're already at this sense of value that we think we aren't at yet, that we that we think we just desire, whereas we're actually there already, and The imposter syndrome just shows up to say, like, okay, whatever you can tell yourself, whatever stories you want, but like you said, the shoulds and stuff, but just be, man, just be, because people are receiving source through you, no matter what. How is that landing for you? It feels very much like it pulls you out of presence, and that's a frustrating feeling. Is the being pulled out of presence a frustrating feeling? Or is the frustration with the feeling the hard part? Both? Because we always get pulled out of presence. We're human beings. You know, we get distracted, and we have visual and sensational cues in front of us all the time. I mean, that's an organic part of being human. I think it's the frustration with that being pulled out of presence, rather than being in a recognition that you're being pulled out of presence and then coming back into it, or following where you are being called into presence at the moment, it might be like, Okay, I'm being pulled out of presence. Oh, maybe I am meant to be present somewhere else right now. Maybe I'm meant to be present within. Maybe I'm meant to be present with my inner child. Maybe I'm meant to be present with spirit. And the environment in which I've been placed is inviting that forward for me, because you actually are very present. You were very present in this experience. You came right into presence with what was arriving for you, but you weren't in presence necessarily with the 3d situation that you were in. And that feels somehow wrong, because I'm supposed to be present here. I'm supposed to be engaging here. I'm supposed to be showing up a certain way, when instead, it's like, actually, I'm not an imposter. I'm actually somebody who's being fully true to the Divine invitation in this moment. And that divine invitation in this moment is presence with a part of myself, even though it's socially appropriate for me to be present in another way that feels good. It's like the ultimate revolution, right? Because it's like, oh, you're you're being defiant, or you're being anti social, or you're being this or that, because you're not engaging in the way that you are supposed to in this environment or in this exchange. And you can say, Wow, that person's really scattered, that person's really distracted, that person isn't really focused or really here or really present, actually, they're extremely present. They're just present with something that is richer for them, for their current alchemy, not based on anybody else's decision or or label, but based on what source has given and and activated. This is a richer alchemy for this person right now.
Jenna 6:44
How do you differentiate that between being present in energy and being in like, a state of freeze
Laura 6:52
or dissociation? Yeah? Which
Jenna 6:56
I don't think I did, because I was like, Hey, can we get on a call and do this real quick? Yeah? Yeah. So I see the difference there, but in the moment is the question. I mean, it doesn't matter, I guess, to even have that recognition just, I guess it's how you choose to process it, right?
Laura 7:12
Well, I think it's something that we I think we talked about this in our previous episode of like, as long as there's movement, you're not in freeze, because freeze means I can't think, I can't speak, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't freeze. Is, is is frozen? It's a shutdown. It's a shutdown. Yeah, so I see two things here. I see there was still motion for you, very attentive, present, aware motion. And the other piece is, sometimes, is it necessary for the nervous system to maybe mimic a bit of a dissociative, slash free state, so that we access a higher level of consciousness and wisdom that is coming in at a more profound, deep, transformational level, that we need to not be as engaged with all of our five senses in that moment, because there's such deep transformation occurring. And it's almost like when they will induce a coma for somebody to be able to get to that level of deep healing that they need in order to get to the next level. Kind of like that.
Jenna 8:18
I like that analogy. I think part of the the reeling that I had to stop when I was in that moment was okay, is this a a bunch of the the attachments that we put on ourselves, and how we are dealing with something, and how we're moving through something, and how we're how we're expanding, you know, because it's like, Oh, am I? Am I in freeze? Am I not being present. Am I whatever, whatever, whatever? And then it pulls you out of actually being in receipt of that energy. Yeah. So it's just kind of like teetering on this, like slide scale of receipt of energy and of yourself,
Laura 8:55
yeah. And I think that what I love is that coming right out of it. It was like I desire to receive you claimed receipt from a 3d perspective, from an engagement perspective, by saying, let's jump up and I'll have it. Let's jump on and have this conversation, right? You claimed that and grabbed that right away. That is not freeze mode, no. And I think you're right. Like, when, when this happens in real time, we our minds are okay, am I? Am I in? Freeze my in it like we try to analyze it. We try to label it, when really in that moment. I always use this example because I think it's so helpful. We don't give ourselves this grace with emotional situations or, like, confusing situations. If a child falls outside and they skin their knee, and it's just, it's terrible. It's bloody. They're screaming, right? We run right to them, and we're just like, Okay, pick you up. Let's clean it off. Let's, you know, we run right to them, and we're very attentive in that moment to the wound. And we're like, Okay, we're gonna clean it. We're gonna put something on it, and then we're gonna breathe and we're gonna. Okay, like, do you want to rest for a little bit? Do you want to go back out and play? Like, what we tend to it, but when it's at our inner child that feels a wound, or that feels, uh, you know, a gaping hole, it's like, okay, well, first I'm going to analyze why this happened. What is this here for? Like, why did you skin your knee? Meanwhile, the kids bleed now, right? So it's like, why did you skin your knee? And it's like, do you fucking care? Like, who gives a shit? Just clean the shit up, right? And so that's the thing. It's like, when these activations occur, can we look at them the same way, where it's like, okay, I'm just gonna come into presence, which is actually exactly what you did. You came into presence, and you attended to the wound, and you wrote about it, and you were present with it right away, and then you moved into okay. Now, what do I want to do with this? You actually followed a protocol that is so much more graceful to our emotional experience, but they may not be considered socially appropriate, because you're going within and attending to that right away, whereas what we're used to in society so that we are, you know, putting on the mask we're supposed to and playing the game the way we're meant to. It's like, okay, well, I'm in the middle of this, so I'll deal with you later. And then sometimes we forget later, and that shit doesn't get attended to, and that's great if you can move past it too, right? Like there's also value in that, but this is how things can build. And these are, like, the precise moments that we can harness, that you can alchemize fast, and then shit doesn't build in the background.
Jenna 11:39
And it makes me think of how we've talked about this before in the past, about how we both can use our minds as defense mechanisms. Easy, Oh,
Laura 11:48
yeah. Intellectualization is, like my favorite defense mechanism, yeah,
Jenna 11:52
yeah. I'm up there with that one too. That's just what's coming forward with. That is, is how we can just slide into mind, manipulation of our emotion,
Laura 12:04
because you're trying to, like, convince yourself of something or prove something to yourself,
Jenna 12:10
compartmentalize it in a certain way,
Laura 12:12
or like, prove that you have a right to feel this way or don't right, like you need to justify it to yourself. Like, why does it need to be justified? It just is, and it's in motion, and it's going to move.
Jenna 12:23
What makes you think imposter syndrome like, Where? Where does that originate? Is that a mind or like, does that originate in the mind? Is that, does that originate in, like, subconscious shit? Just as a general question.
Laura 12:36
I mean, I think that it's rooted in subconscious shit. I think that there's definitely some past life and ancestral roots with that, for sure. And I also think that just from a I think, I think a couple things. One, from a collective standpoint, it's I have to kind of fall in line. This is why belonging is is related to it, like you said right at the start, right? You know, I have to kind of fall in line with my community, because if I get kicked out of that eons and eons ago, when we would kick people would get kicked out of society, a society or a community. They wouldn't have access to food, they wouldn't have access to shelter, they wouldn't have access to water, and it was like their their survival depended on being in community, and that is deeply wired into into our nervous systems at a very deep layer, right? Like deeply wired. And so it's like, I think that's the, the core, root of it, from a nervous system standpoint, is like, no, I need to, like, hold on to this, and I need to fall in line with this. Because if I'm ostracized, I'm I'm fucked like what I might not live and it's us re teaching and our nervous systems that it's a different time now. We're living in a different way, just like when we kind of shift into new layers of ourselves, like we're operating differently, we're looking at things differently, right? And from an ancestral perspective, I think that this can come up for anybody, particularly who has had interactions with narcissistic humans, particularly in childhood, and a deep fear of being the same way. And I think that this can also come up, even as if you identify as female in this society, and feeling like stepping into that role is not correct, is somehow we have to show up in a certain way that's even more demonstrative, because we have to prove that we have a right to be here.
Jenna 14:24
Yeah and then there's like, this sense of, like, selfishness that kind of creeps in there too. And just like, Oh, Jesus Christ. What are all these things? And then, and then, when you sit back and you're you're with them all, it's like, okay, I'm assigning all of this to myself.
Laura 14:38
I love that. I love that, because at the same time that you can release that burden, you are also humbling yourself by giving it to the divine. It's not about me, right? It's about the divine. I wish that we could put a sign on our foreheads all day, every day that remind us you know that we are not the ones leading here. We choose to be led, but. We are not the ones leading here. And I think that selfishness in the body is just a sensation to come to. I think it's a I think it's a self forgiveness thing. I think it's a disgust thing. I think that very clearly is inner child, ancestral stuff that comes up.
Jenna 15:13
Yeah, I can see that, yeah.
Laura 15:15
Just be present with it. Breathe with it. Be like it's okay. Like, have your tantrum. Be here, because you know that's not you, and you know that's not who you're becoming, but you also know it's a disgusting energy for you that just isn't even yours. It's literally not even yours, because that stuff that gets even stickier, that doesn't just move pretty quickly, is not ours.
Jenna 15:36
I like that reminder, and I even wrote down, you know, feel the energy and clear your own like, feel only you when I was initially in this.
Laura 15:44
And I think, you know, I think too, just thinking of what I know of you, and also just any, anybody, too, who has had issues with, like, co dependency in general, but in their families of origin as well. It's almost like, Oh, I'm shifting to a different family, I'm shifting to a different identity, I'm shifting to a different sense of belonging. I'm shifting to a different soul family. And there's some kind of like betrayal energy that can exist under that of like, I'm supposed to be loyal to my family and I'm supposed, you know what I'm saying, because I'm choosing to do things in a different way or align with a different support network that feels wrong at some level.
Jenna 16:24
Yeah, I can see that. Thank you for seeing me on this.
Laura 16:26
Thank you for bringing it forward. It's pretty fucking hot that you jumped right on this shit. And there's a place for being present with the energy, and there's also a place for knowing when it is the time for you to say, Fuck the energy. I'm ready to just dive in and show up differently. And nobody knows that moment but you. Nobody knows when that moment is but you. And so it's allowing yourself to be prepared for that moment energetically, knowing you are being prepared while you are remaining in presence and also not bypassing, bypassing your human or bypassing spirit. You know you're being present with all of it. And I think that's what can happen, is like we can get so much in the mind that we then bypass the the divine guidance that's coming in, or vice versa.
Jenna 17:21
Because, I mean, I know that I'm going to be in that environment again that I was just in right. And I'm like, I don't want that same energy to stick around or to reappear in the same way, or reappear at all. So it's like, I want to get this settled,
Laura 17:38
But, see, but you don't want to get it settled from a place of fear and desperation or lack.
Jenna 17:43
No, I just want it to be seen so I can, you know, I don't know better. Hold myself, right?
Laura 17:52
All it is is alchemy, because it's just that catalyst of saying this is what you're being invited to heal and cultivate and embody before the next experience.
Jenna 18:05
Exactly. Oh, now this feels complete. Yay. Thank you. It didn't feel complete yet, but now it does.
Laura 18:10
Yeah, it does. Thank you so much for bringing this forward. It's all preparation, and it's not a fear around Oh, I gotta get this done. It is it is done, and I can't wait to see see it unfold, because I know how I'm going to show up. I don't have to fear how I'm going to show up. I know it is done, but yeah, exactly that. All right, beautiful. Thank you everyone for joining us and let us know how you feel and how you received this and what's coming up for you in the comments. We love you and we will see you very soon. Bye for now.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai
